Our Story: Tiny Wings

I posted previously about a situation that had made life difficult but that I wasn't ready to discuss it yet.
Now I think I am. 

August 19th is the Day of Hope.

It's a day to commemorate and spread awareness of pregnancy, infant and child loss. 

As many of you know, there is a day in October used to commemorate the same. 

Aug 19th is also about breaking the silence regarding the loss of pregnancy or child.

There are a lot of families who have endured the same painful event - many don't feel like speaking about it. 

Of course, you can read more about it at the link above, but that's the gist of it.

It's been three months for us, and now I feel ready to finally open up about it. 

There's nothing shameful in losing a pregnancy and it is a shame that there seems to be a cultural stigma around the idea of losing what could have been.

So here's our story.

In late April 2013, we fell pregnant with my IUD still in place.

We quickly became hopeful and attached despite the fact that we knew things had a fair chance of not turning out the way that we wish they would.

What we didn't know was that it was an ectopic pregnancy.

After four ultrasounds, three pelvic exams, nearly twenty blood draws, and two methotrexate injections, it was physically finished.

We had a week of hope in another child before everything went so rapidly downhill. 

In that time span, we had even picked names. A name in a week is an absolute record for us.

Thankfully, my body was able to handle the situation and there were no hospital stays involved, but it was a long time before I was back to feeling like anything close to normal.

Even though we knew for so short a time and nothing came of it besides a home pregnancy test with a positive result and scarring on my arms from having blood drawn so frequently, our hearts still ache.

Time, of course, improves all things.

But it's hard to accept.

You were here for so short a time, but will never be forgotten.